So today I went to a doctor that’s a limb specialist to check up on my hands.

Since none of the doctors were abel to help or even find out whats wrong with me bifore I didn’t have much expectations for today. Things were getting better with my hands and I’m abel to draw a bit again with less pain in my hand, I tought I had a muscle inflamation and when that was healed I’d be all back to normal… I hoped

Turns out I have a deformed joint where the thumb finger is in. I also have weak tendons, they are so weak that the doctor was able to disconect my joint without me eaven realising he was doing that. But I can’t fix either of those things. I was born with a flattened joint and weak tendons.

Of course right now I also have tendon inflamation and my joint is a bit hurt, thats why the pain is constant, so I hope that will get a bit better. But I have to take some anti inflamation pills every time my hands start to hurt and I have to wear a thumb orthosis every time I draw so my hand isn’t overwhelmed. Probably for the rest of my life.

I tried out a thumb orthosis and it sucks and I hope I’ll be abel to find one that is comfortable.

It’s like a sick joke or irony, maybe eaven karma. I feel like my hopes and dreams for the future are practicaly getting crushed. Drawing with my criple hands, being an ilustrator or designer with a goddamn orthosis and pain killers. Let’s hope shit gets better.

It might be a childish thing to say but I always tought I was born to be an “artist” or rather to draw, It was always a part of me. Since I was a kid I always dreamt to be a painter or ilustrator. I looked up to my grandad and mom who are really good at drawing and painting and tought ” I wana be like them when I grow up” and I still do in some way. Actualy I have higher expectations, I wana live off of drawing, desighning. And now, since these problems I have, I started doubting everything.

I guess I’m just a bit worried

holy shit
A solid fucking sketch after 4 fucking months. God damn. I missed drawing.
I went to some healer lady because of my shity hands and she gave me a masage, the next day my hands didn’t hurt that much, so I tried drawing and it didn’t hurt as much as it usualy did. fuck that lady is awesome man wtf, i don’t eaven know what she did yo (ಥ⌣ಥ)
It’s actualy embarasing how little it took to heal my hands. I’m going to her againg on the 30th of April and maybe after that I’ll be completly ok :’>I hope so…
drew my bb Noah ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

holy shit

A solid fucking sketch after 4 fucking months. God damn. I missed drawing.


I went to some healer lady because of my shity hands and she gave me a masage, the next day my hands didn’t hurt that much, so I tried drawing and it didn’t hurt as much as it usualy did. fuck that lady is awesome man wtf, i don’t eaven know what she did yo (ಥ⌣ಥ)

It’s actualy embarasing how little it took to heal my hands. I’m going to her againg on the 30th of April and maybe after that I’ll be completly ok :’>
I hope so…

drew my bb Noah ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ